Some of the most affected parties in any divorce are those who hardly have a say in the matter — your children. If adults can go through extreme guilt during separation, you can imagine the amount of negativity it can have on your kids. Accordingly, here are a few useful reminders to help them through detrimental divorce guilt.
Show Love and Acceptance
“What have I done for this to happen?” is the usual reaction of a child when the impending separation looms over them. What’s worse is they keep silent about their feelings of self-condemnation, which can result in emotional and mental trauma. Whoever ends up with the kids, you and your partner should show them continuous love during and after the proceedings. This counters your children’s guilty feelings even if they aren’t open about it.
Say It In Their Language
For preschoolers, simplify your statements. Add in assurances and acceptance even after the divorce. Dealing with pre-teens and older kids may be a lot more emotional, but they can better understand the situation if you break it to them gently. Whatever their age, always tell them that the divorce is not their fault.
Be Civil With Your Ex
No matter how bad your relationship was, your ex-partner is still the parent of your child. Not unless it’s a case of child abuse, hearing one parent badmouth the other can worsen any guilt-complex in your children, especially if they still hold both of you in high regard. Keep the bad talk among yourselves and your Denver family law attorneys. In your kids’ presence, act friendly or be civil since you no longer have to stay together for your children’s sake.
As a responsible parent, you should prioritize your kids’ feelings, especially when they’re too young to understand the concept of divorce. It would be unfair for them to suffer divorce guilt when they don’t even have a say in the split. Even if you are no longer a spouse, you’re still a parent to your child after the divorce.